With Love, Thelms

Turning 21 this past fall was such an exciting time in my life. It wasn’t exciting because I was finally able to drink legally (although that was a plus), but because I felt like I was getting to start a new stage in my life. For as long as I could remember I was always dying to grow up. Don’t tell anyone, but I don’t want to grow up anymore (it’s so hard), but it’s very necessary. Turning 21 is so much more than getting to drink legally as often as you’d like or party it up with your friends every night. Today I want to share with you 9 crucial things that I think every 21 year old should know.

1. ALCOHOL ISN’T GOING ANYWHERE, SIP SLOW

Don’t get so blinded by the alcohol you’re now able to drink legally that it goes over your head. Trust me, I’m a margarita kinda girl with sugar on the rim or a Pomegranate sangria babe if I’m in a somber mood… However, I don’t let that desire go over my head every time I have a drink. I think for some it’s so easy to feel the need to drink as often as possible (once you can legally) to the point that you’re getting wasted at every event, but it’s never that serious. I’m sorry, but in my opinion alcohol is not that serious. Granted it does pair deliciously with almost every meal, but it’s not THAT serious. I think with most things it’s healthy to never over indulge in anything most of all alcohol if you have no sense of self-control. The alcohol will be there when you get to the bar and it will certainly be there when you’re leaving. I promise.

2. LOVE the skin YOU’RE in

You don’t have to have everything together and you definitely don’t have to be perfect. While being excited about reaching this pivotal next stage in your life, sometimes society makes you believe that you are supposed to have it all together. I mean altogether (boyfriend, set in stone career plans, steady income, perfect skin, zero superficial flaws, etc). It’s important to get to know, love, and live happily in the skin you’re in now. Know that there will always be a chance for improvement and change to be better, but it’s not necessary (or healthy) to obsess over it. Seeking perfection in yourself so much so that you obsess over it is cruel and unkind to your body. I always defer to the popular quote from a Dr. Seuss book when talking about this… “Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is NO ONE alive, that is youer than you.” Picking up this book by Cameron Diaz the other day was a great reminder of that. I totally recommend it!

3. DON’T TAKE YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY

If you know me well, you know I never take myself or some of my actions too seriously. Granted I can be a bit anal when it comes to certain things, but I’m not one to be super uptight or unflexible. Having a crack at yourself every now and then is not only healthy, but all in good fun. You’re only turning 21, LIVE A LITTLE. Laugh a lot and loosen up. After all, that is what this key age in everyone’s life is meant to make you live like even if it’s for a short period of time. I’ll be the first one to sing in public if a song I love comes on (play life is a highway by Rascal Flatts and you will have a full blown performance on your hands), hurl over in laughter at something so ridiculous that has been brought to my attention, or swearing I can guess the server’s birthday at  a restaurant I’m eating at.

4. BE ON TIME

Make being on time to anything you have to be at or have been invited to a priority. You’re an adult now and you have been for a few years. The excuse that x, y, or z happened just isn’t going to cut it anymore. Trust me I know, I have had my fair share of issues arise because I was late and it’s still something I’m working to perfect.

5. NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE UGLY

Gosh, that’s such a loaded statement. Let me explain! What I mean by that is never leave the house feeling like you look like absolute shit. It will do nothing for you, but bring down your confidence level and have you in a rut for the remainder of the day. I’m not saying leave the house everyday looking like Kim Kardashian or Beyonce, but make a special effort to be pleased with your appearance no matter what it comes across as. It’s all about that inner self-confidence. If Thursday is all about being comfortable and wearing little to no makeup, do that! At the same time be secure enough to know that although it’s a casual day, your idea of casual is still very much presentable and that top knot is something seriously cute. You know what I mean? If Monday is all about going for the “I just rolled out of bed look; make it comfy and yet still presentable. You don’t have to actually look like you rolled out of bed if it’s going to deplete the confidence you normally have for yourself on a day to basis. If Friday afternoon is all about a casual chic, do it! Wear it loud and proud, feeling secure enough to not question yourself.

6. EAT GOOD, BUT STAY HEALTHY

Food is so freaking good. I mean who doesn’t like to eat?! Whenever I think of a really great meal, I kid you not my mouth starts to water profusely. Food and I have a very lovey dovey relationship. With that being said, it’s very important however to be cautious of what you’re consuming on a day to day basis. I am not saying obsess over your food intake. Instead, be mindful of the ratio of bad food to good food you’re putting inside of your precious body. Eating bad in your early 20’s DOES catch up to you, whether it shows through your weight gain in a year or your destroyed organs in ten. It DOES CATCH UP TO YOU.

7. TAKE AMAZING CARE OF YOUR SKIN

Boy oh boy, I would give anything to have taken this seriously when I was sixteen. Five years later and I’m truly understanding the importance of a skincare routine. I can’t preach this enough honestly. Wearing masks once a week, using an exfoliator, washing your face two times a day, understanding the importance of wearing sunscreen EVERY SINGLE DAY; those are all things that may seem tedious but are very necessary to everlasting youthful skin.

8. YOUR DREAM GUY WILL COME… just might not be immediately

There’s this notion that when you turn 21 you’re instantly an adult in all contexts. You have a steady boyfriend that you’re going to be with for four years before being engaged, married, and kids come into play because your good girlfriend found her dream guy when she turned 21. That is not the case for everyone and it doesn’t have to be a bad or depressing thing. What other’s journey may amount to is not for you to worry about, least off all be jealous of. Your dream guy or girl WILL come. Use this time while you wait to focus on your career, on your friendships, on anything that’s going to promote productivity in your life. A good friend of mine always says,”There’s 2 billion people in the world, you’ll find the right one at some point.” She’s right! I know it seems cliché, but there really is so much to life than being in a relationship. Don’t get me wrong though, having a partner definitely has a surplus of perks but your life shouldn’t revolve around finding one.

9. ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY, DON’T RUN FROM IT

As much as this age may mean freedom and absolute control of your life with that comes many new responsibilities. It’s easy to run from them and use your parents as a safety net for all your troubles, but that can’t be the solution forever. Instead, get ahead of those issues personal or career wise and tackle them head on. Be aware that more responsibilities will fall in your lap, it’s how you handle them that will be the true test. Gain knowledge on many thing as you truly dive into your 20’s and don’t be afraid to learn more. After all, who said turning 21 was boring? No one ever.