With Love, Thelms

So you’re either one of two readers, reading this post.

You’re either someone who looooves self help books, despise self help books, or just don’t really care and want to stay connected with what I’m chatting about today. LOL, I’m kind of hoping for some of you babes, the third category is actually a thing.

Wait then. Did I say two readers? I guess there are actually three different types.

Personally, I’m neither a lover or extreme hater of self books — I’m mostly indifferent but at the surprising rate that self help books continue to be a thing and EVERYONE’S writing one I felt like speaking out.

Keep reading for 4 reasons why I personally think peeps should, ‘Stop Reading Self Help Books’:

1. CHANCE THAT WORDS COULD BE TAKEN TOO LITERALLY

Either due to the author being some major big wig, or because you believe so much — the words in self help books are taken waaaaay too literally.

“Quit your job and pursue your passion.” So you quit your job in the hopes of pursuing your passion.

“Move to another state and begin living the life you’ve always imagined.” You drop everything and skedaddle.

“Completely ignore life’s challenges and focus only on being happy.” Everything’s crashing & burning around you and you’re smiling; megawatt style.

If taken too literally, words in these books can do more harm than good to someone; dependent of course on their lifestyle or situation. Quitting your job and pursuing your passion may not be the answer for everyone and could land you in some hot water where financial responsibilities are concerned (e.g. kids, wife, bills, etc). Moving to another state with infamous words such as ‘I’m moving to Cali with $500 and a dream‘ taking front seat in your mind, maybe a risk not worth taking.

2. LOSS OF SELF SUFFICIENCY 

Sometimes, it’s easier to read about how to fix your problems than actually stepping out into the world and FIXING YOUR PROBLEMS. The words of another can be so comfortable that the thought of doing some change (yourself) sounds more appealing than the action of it. It’s like you get all this new information, but fall flat in actually implementing it into your life. What happened to being self sufficient? What happened to using the experiences of another as a guide and not the end all be all? In my opinion, self help books aren’t meant to be something that completely solves our problems, but something that guides us in that direction of doing it ourselves.

3. NOT EVERYONE’S BEING HONEST

At the alarming rate that self help books are being published and put out to the world, it makes me question the authenticity of a lot of these so called ‘Self Help Authors.’ Due to the demand of these books increasing within our society, there is a strong chance many of these authors are over exaggerating or omitting certain parts of their journey to confidence, happiness, or wealth. Therefore, many readers are left bummed that your 3 ways to reach ultimate success didn’t amount to anything for them.

4. HIGH CHANCE OF DISAPPOINTMENT 

Just to tag onto the previous sentence, there is high chance for disappointment. Not everyone’s walk in life to reach the golden horizon will be yours as well. As human beings, we’re all different in so many beautiful ways and that’s what continues to make this life so worthwhile. Each person’s journey will be different, so relying on someone to tell you what your journey should be like is fruitless.

 

A self help book ‘can change your perspective, but you must change your life.’

 

I say all of this to say, that we shouldn’t just read these books, but instead make our own life a personal version of self help. Based on the things we as individuals experience in life, we should use them as stepping stones to become better people — looking to these particular books as a form of guidance and not as a problem solver. By no means am I directly telling you to stop reading these books but just be careful. There are gems to be found within self help books, but being cautious of what you’re reading; how you’re reading; and why you’re reading them is much more important.

With all that being said, I want to hear from you guys! What are you babes thoughts? Let’s chat about it below.

In the meantime, I’m going to catch up on some reading & no it’s not a self help book, it’s fiction LOL.

Laters babes,

Thelms xx